warm and sunny....

hmmmm i really wish for that now, well, i'm just thankful that its getting warmer here, i mean the temperature is up a bit, and snow is melting, foggy most of the day though but it doesnt matter as long as no yuckky snow. Winter is not done yet, we are still in the middle of the season, so i'm pretty sure there will be snow again, 1 or 2 days is good and i hope no snow storm anymore this year or i hope not ever again, and not just yuckky weather though that i have to watch out, cold and flu is in season during winter too, for me, as a first timer here, whenever i go out even just outside the house i make sure to wear thick clothing, i mean winter jacket ofcourse and layered clothing under it. There's 1 outfit i always wear when i go out outside the house, and i took some pictures of me wearing it, my bana and my family teased me though, they said i look like an ewok with that attire, ah well, i dont care as long as i'm not cold hehehe......i do hope it will just rain and a few snow for the rest of the winter so that i can go out and go shopping!

snow, snow and more snow....

It's been snowing for more than 2 weeks here in BC, canada now, gosh, unbelievable! My hubby said never had like this before in his entire life, oh how unlucky i am, i wished for just a perfect white christmas but not as much as this. Wierd and yucky weather, rain and snow mixed, when will be over, it seems we still have snow coming this month, yikes! For just 3 months here and experiencing snow for 2 weeks for me, is more than enough. Pls snow, let it be over soon, so people live in normal life again.

My first snowfall...

Before i came here, i wished to have a white christmas, feel the snowfall in my head and play in the snow, indeed, got all what i wished for my first christmas. I woke up last monday and found out it was snowing for the first time, oh i was so delighted, i got out from the house and took a lot of pictures and my husband took a video of me playing in the snow,.oh i had fun. Then second day was still snowing and same on the third day, my gosh its just too much, almost a week its been snowing now, more and more snow falling and filing up on the ground, and so we cant get out as its dangerous. Now, in 5 days the snow is about 60 cm. in depth, i've seen several cars stuck up here, even my husband cant drive his pick up truck as we need to shovel as its burried under the snow. My husband said he never seen like this in BC before, they just had 2 or 3 days of snow and never as bad as this, well, according to the news we had a snow storm this time. Hmmmm.....signs of global warming perhaps?

Sure, Its nice to see the snow, its pure white and when you feel it, its soft like a cotton, and the sky is bright during the night too due to the reflection of the snow. But if its as bad as this, i surely want to take back my wishes then, its not fun anymore, you cant get out as its too dangerous, its just so impossible to drive on the road, so it means you cant get out, and my gosh, its super cold too. My husband teased me, that i shouldn't wish for it, i should have wished to win a lottery then. Too bad for my first christmas here in canada.

Hmmm be careful what you wish for, you might suffer for it....

Hope you had a Merry White Christmas!

"Honey, i'm hungry, lets go to Costco"

Costco is a wholesale warehouse here in canada that mostly offers alittle bit lower in price compared to some big grocery stores, well, you usually bargain if you buy in bulk, thats what costco is offering. But what i like about when i go there is that i wont certainly be hungry, as they offer tasting of some new variety of foods such as crackers with new dippings on it, or chocolates, or cheezes and some juices too and many more, every corner has this tasting booth or table, you just grab one and taste, when you pass all those corners, oh you will be full as so many that you can taste, well, its a big store, i'm sure you wont be hungry when you get home. So when we are low with our groceries, i will just say to my husband, "honey, i'm hungry, lets go to costco".

Happy shopping!

Merry Christmas from Akira, the rottweiler dog

This is Akira, a female rottweiler dog, wishing you a Merry Christmas in advance. She loves to play alot especially with my husband. She weighs about 75-80 lbs and she's just a year and a half old, still a puppy, if anyone will break in in our house, she will beat the man in seconds for sure. Rottweilers are very protective with the owner, intelligent and very strong, a type of dog that you dont wanna mess with, they are a good guard dog. Akira barks when anyone near the house as she thinks its a threat, but we usually say " its ok akira" and she will listen and calm down then.

One day she saw me very upset, she looked at my eyes and probably she's wondering why i look different hehe....and she tried to grab my hand by her mouth, and brought me her favorite toy as she wanted to cheer me up. She's very loving and kind, i have several decorations around the house like small breakable things at the center table, plants inside the house and etc., but she never destroyed any of my decorations, even papers lying on the floor, and i'm proud to say she's well trained to do her thing outside the house. One thing i cant stand with the rotties though, is farting, gosh akira and her mother and brother farts and produce a very rancid odor, i have a shipoo dog back in the philippines but never smelled farts as bad as akira and the rest rotties, its just unbearable...but they are adorable, and a good guard dog, thats what really matters.

Decorating my X-mas tree

Time to move on, christmas is approaching, its time to thank God for all the blessings we got all through these years.

Before i came here in canada, my bana (hubby) bought lots of christmas ornaments, he wants our first christmas together be a special one and to torture me, i can say, in putting all those decorations. Before i saw all the ornaments, my husband and i agreed that he will be the one to set up the christmas tree and the lights for outside and i will be the one to decorate the tree and decorating inside the house. Oh i was amazed when he showed me all 4 big boxes of christmas ornaments, it seems we will decorating a big big christmas tree in the mall hehe...

I can say i had fun decorating our tree, in 2 days, i finished setting up all those christmas ornaments and figured out where to put some christmas emblems, like santa and angels and etc. in most likely all parts of the house but i didnt put all those decorations though, just 80%, its too overwhelming inside the house.

Posted some pictures of our living room, to show how it looks like.......hope you like it!

lowest moment of my life...

Just wednesday evening around 8 pm, after i had my dinner, i felt pain in my lower abdomen, went out to our room as i thought it will relieve by lying in bed, but the pain gets so intense and for just a couple of hours it became excruciating pain and when i sat up in the bed i felt gush of blood with a big tissue on it, my husband brought me to the nearest hospital right then with no bra under my shirt and just wearing my pajamas with alittle blood on it, yikes, i felt sooo yuckky....oh i just cant describe the pain, i cant barely walk, no matter how i tried to reposition myself just to ease the pain but nothing else i can do but to cry and squeezed my husband's hand, while waiting for the doctor in er, i had heavy bleeding with big blood clot, and around 4 am the doctor came and examined me and he said that there's a tissue in the blood clots, and then he said i had a miscarriage as my cervix is open already, my God that word really hit me so bad, even painful than the pain that i'm going through at that time, so thankful wiht the morphine that doctor injected on me though, that really eased the pain, but gosh that word is really shocking to us, both my husband and i, my gosh i just cant believe it. Around 2:30 pm, i had an ultrasound just to make sure if i had a miscarriage or not and to make sure too if there's still tissue left in my uterus, but so sad to say, the nurse cant see anything during the ultrasound, no baby anymore and no tissue left too....gosh, i felt no hope there, i just cant believe i dont have my little angel inside me now, i cried so hard, its a devastating news for both my husband and i....but my husband is so supportive of me, he was strong and tried to explain to me at that moment that its not our time yet to have a baby this time.

after the ultrasound, while waiting for the doctor at the lobby, the nurse who took care of me while i was in er, she came to us and really touched our heart, she expelained to us that probably its a will of God, she said she's working with special children, she said to us that the baby or the fetus might have a problem already thats why God didnt allow that to continue and she said we have little angel in heaven watching over us now. That nurse really a blessing to us, because i kept on asking myself and my husband what went wrong as i am so careful with my pregnancy, but because of what she told us, it really enlightened our heart and our mind.

Its just awkward now that the signs and symptoms of pregnancy like the tenderness of my breast, and frequent urination are suddenly gone now. I've been so careful with my pregnancy, our family doctor was shocked as i am 2 months pregnant already and he said that the percentage of miscarriage in that period of pregnancy are just 25%....oh well, i am included in that 25% though, so unlucky for me. But i believe in what the nurse told us, its not our time yet, probably the fetus or the embryo (as its still 8 weeks though) has problems already. It's true i guess, as i had bleeding for more than a week already and around 4 days after i start my blood spotting as it should be, it seems my bleeding gets heavier everyday until last wednesday night, i suspected unusual there. Oh well, God has other plan for us, i know there's always a reason for this. God will give us something that we can handle. Its just so sad for my family though, especially to my parents, they are so excited with the baby as its their first grandchild. Well, there's always next time, my husband and i wont stop to give them a healthy grandchild, in God's will.

I am so thankful with my husband as he is so supportive of me, he stands strong for us, he never lost hope. He holds and hugged me wholeday and really took care of me, that insident, it makes us stronger and realized how important our life together. I'm thankful too that my husband is on vacation right now for a month, i wont be alone at home then, it will be easier for me as i'm still recovering right now.

God work in mysterious ways, He knows whats best for us. For 2 months being pregnant, its been a wonderful feeling, everyday is truly a miracle for me. There's always next time, and for sure God will give us a pretty healthy baby next time, who knows a twin maybe.